The Power of Choice or Fear : You CHOOSE!

It’s not easy to give up on one’s thoughts. Especially if something is haunting you and coming back to you in forms of dreams, daunting thoughts and much more. There comes a time in everybody’s life that they require to acquire the standards to stand steadfast in the face of life telling it to “piss off“;  cause no matter how much it scares them, not thinking about it leave about even deadly scars beneath their skin. Life and love goes parallel to each other. Most of the times, the junctions for both of the journeys might be the same yet one decision can lead to drastic changes in the course of journey you’ve been planning ahead since a long time. My life is no different. It brought me up on a platform, where I had to choose. Choice is a crucial word – it’s a war. It either destroys or builds up the future in one second – as easy as blinking yet consequences come with a great price. That makes me go back to think why Robert Frost chose the path ‘less travelled by’. He knew his sense of choice would matter; it would change what he wanted and needed in his future life.

Not that this is the first time that I had to choose. I am 19, I have made many choices until now but I don’t regret any. Instead, we all make many choices on daily basis, don’t we? Not every choice I made had led to what I desired, yet I don’t regret cause in one way or the other, they have taught me the lesson of “life”. Everything you desire is not exactly what you need but Almighty knows better how needs are required to be fulfilled before your wants and desires or the other times it is just that everything doesn’t come the easy way. Life is all about challenges, isn’t it? On the dark morning of October 1st, 2013; I knew what was to last for no longer within me. A part of me that will be taken away forever and may be this time I could regret given how my future has been framed by my destiny. I believe in changing the destiny with one’s actions and good will but there are times when you stand helpless against the massive blow of Nature. This time, I adored what I have been bestowed with but regardless how much I loved and adored for being chosen for the blessing, I couldn’t keep it – I had to choose; a choice to deny the happiness for the sake of fear. This time, it wasn’t solely my choice, another being was involved with me and that being’s choices substantially made a difference. However, I would never blame the choices made by that being. Our decisions were mutual; I let go of my happiness with my very own hands because of the fear element dominating the situation – it was my choice to honor the way I have lived my life until now.

Life is short, love living it and let all the odds be in your favor! Have a good productive day!

 

I Love You!

Note: This poem is another real-life story. This is the story of my very dear friend who has over the time fallen for a man who possess a life-turning history that can move anyone! He is a gem and truly deserve to be loved for who he is. I have met him personally and I believe that men like him are found rarely on this planet for he never curses the life’s mishaps instead enjoy competing with them. He is an inspiration and I believe what he did for his family isn’t a piece of cake. It is his birthday today and I wish him a very warm Happy Birthday with blessings for his health and happiness. I hope he and my friend can succeed in paving their way together.

The poem can be confusing but I do not want to fade the charm by my explanations. All I can say is consider my friend and her lover on the scene – I’m not included even if the poetry sounds like “I” all the time.

Hey buddy, if you are reading this one’s for you!  Happy Birthday! *High Five*

Your arms comfort me,
Your love is all I can see.

Deep oceans and vast skies,
Love’s in the air – no goodbyes.

Claim me; I belong to you,
Waiting on the moment when I can say I DO!

Life’s been a torture and a harsh examination.
You’ve fought the hatred, bullies and raising inflation.

The day you sobbed while murmuring the story of your past,
My heart was stabbed and my heartbeat so fast.

You told me how previously you had nothing to eat,
You had to shift houses – move from street to street.

Your wife was your support and you loved her truly,
She paced with you despite of life being so unruly.

You looked at her and the miseries seemed off shore,
Her arms were your heaven and her love your highest score.

The world conspired against both of you,
However, you remained steadfast as the time flew.

*From this turn, I have changed the speech of the poem. The poem continues to be his narration (in my words, of course) *

Seven years of struggle, efforts and resistance,
Letting her go was the destiny’s decision.

Two different religions portray us as criminals,
If love is a crime then I will commit it in all my life’s intervals.

The world parted us,
My soul couldn’t take the fuss.

The divorce papers were on the desk,
Failure invaded my heart – my reflection so grotesque.

How can I sign them for I love her name?
How can I forget those memories we together framed?

The world’s cruel and brutal but my heart is at peace,
I smile when I encounter how her life’s at ease.

Her gleaming eyes deserve all the happiness,
How can I forget her lovely caresses?

She loved me, for who I was,
She adored me exceptionally without laws.

Today, on my birthday I cherish my memories with her,
Our lively memories that can never be blurred.

She looks at me from the photo I have clutched,
Her pretty smile makes me feel the warmth of her touch.

Many may come in my life though,
No one can fade the charm of her glow.

Life can be excruciating to wound you,
Make your way through and be forever true.

Your family is your first Ministry!

August 12^th 1996 – a two-year old little girl surely did not know the significance of this date at such a young age yet she celebrated it every year (and will continue to) since the day she knew what birthdays were and whose birth date made this date special. Well, if you guys (I mean both gals and fellas) are thinking to apply brakes to the present and dive into the history books or lectures you must have received in past from your history teachers then take a deep breath – I am not talking about anything such as that yet I will astound you with how every date is special within itself.

Umair’s (my brother’s) sweet sixteenth!!

Except of some breathtaking facts like the only silent film “Wings” won an Oscar for best picture in 1927 on the very same date of August 12th, Soviet Union conducted a secret test of its 1st hydrogen bomb in 1953 on the same date, William Shatner was married to Gloria Rand on August 12th 1956 (yeah, its lame but spare me without smacking me down), the very first time two people were in space in 1962 on August 12th, China & Japan signed a peace treaty in 1978, the very first IBM Personal Computer was released on the very same date (12^th August) in 1981 and in 1996 I was blessed with a new-born baby – of course I can’t be a mother at the age of two but a baby brother was warmly welcomed!! Two years younger than me – not even exactly two; just a one day less than 2 because he is 12^th August and me 13^th! Celebrating birthday together is utmost fun but this time it was something special – it was his “SWEET SIXTEENTH”! This post is going to be informal so anyone who wishes to kick me or punch me in my gut ; all of you are warmly welcome to email me but the emotional and exhilarating episode yet have to gear up!

Left to Right : Me, Umair (the birthday boy) and Atif (my other brother)
Love them to the core!

Well, it was his sweet sixteenth and my eighteenth so August 2012 was much awaited since New Year (or may be even before)! His birthday was a blast! I surprised him at the midnight with some balloons and a cake and party crackers so I can just blew him off his seat and make him wonder at how super awesome his siblings are! I am sure he felt it but he didn’t feel comfortable to express his happiness and there was a reason behind that too. His O levels result was expected on August 13^th (my birthday) so he was all anxious about the upcoming result and least concerned to take part in the celebrations of his birthday blast. At times, I asked him to smile and be confident about how his hard work and struggle would be paid back but all I received was a “GRIN” or may be some words under his breath (can be curse words too for releasing down the pressure in the most abnormal way) or it was an outburst like “SHUT UP” or “DUHH” – anyway whatever it was; it made me go all crazy to tease him more and more! He slept around 3 in the morning (mum and dad were certainly snoring in their bed by that time) and before that he was praying for himself like geeks! I even teased him that if he would have put this much effort before exams in his studies then he would have not been this worried – he hated me for pulling his leg from time to time but isn’t it all we call “THE SIBLING’S LOVE”! I even offered him a drive though I did not have my driving license as there was still a day to go to be 18 but he refused and I think he missed out the fun we would have had wandering from street to street playing with the peace of night. After all, he slept at 3 am and I was all curious to make the day special for him. I made a card for him and packed him a digital camera and a perfume (Eternity for MEN) that I had bought for him earlier – I hoped he would love it. I then slept around 6 in the morning and woke up before him to make some coffee muffins he loves. Few hours later, when he was smiling and laughing I was contented. It is always a different feeling to see your young boy smiling and laughing; a feeling of contentment and delight embraces the soul when you succeed to paint a smile across his face – when they smile, the efforts are worth it. I was on cloud nine as I have had succeeded to make him forget the anxiety of his upcoming result. He loved the presents whole-heartedly (greatly expected, who wouldn’t have had? – I was saving for an eternity to buy him those things). After all, the day ended and I captured his smiles in my head as I knew I would be away from them very soon (my university starting and I have to move to Leicester, England). There was no surprise for me at midnight but million calls and my parent’s and sibling’s hugs and wishes made it special in itself – I cherished each and every moment as I wondered if I would be here to celebrate my next birthday; all I did the entire time was resisted myself to not spill a tear because I didn’t want my mommy to get upset or overwhelming at this particular day!

I love my mum!!
PS– This is an old picture around a year and a half ago!

Don’t forget, when I write there is always a message concealed and this time there is one too. Family is family and there is no alternative for family – neither your boy-friend/girl-friend nor your friends because your parents are a treasure in disguise. You may not realize their worth in their life time but once they abandon you then the thousand wishes in the wish-well can’t bring them back so love them now for who they are and thank them for supporting you throughout without any selfish means. Your siblings are your very best friends; they make the world around you beautiful and amusing – the fun and enjoyment you have with them is an exciting priceless adventure that in no way can be compared to anything in this universe. They understand you and defend you even when you are wrong; take your blames on their own shoulders even at the age of six; argue with parents and the world around to prove you right – their presence is a blessing for which you should be grateful everyday.  I read it somewhere and it fascinated me a lot and so I will share it with you.

BOY-FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.

GIRL-FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.

FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.

FAMILY = Look at the last three words – ILY – I LOVE YOU.

Amazing, isn’t it? I love my family and their presence is a blessing for me for which I am thankful to Almighty and will be throughout my life! I pray for their protection from evil and health and happiness. Amen. Do not forget to pray for your family everyday; they should be your very first priority so if you are done reading it and haven’t talked to your parents or siblings (even daughters or sons for the matter) since a while then call them up and let them know that they will always be cherished. This world is not a place for hatred instead it should be the aroma of love spreading far and wide; hence forget the old wounds and take an initiative to cradle your relationships and knot a new thread if you have not been in contact with your family and if my words aren’t convincing then remember your childhood days – I am sure you will be rushing to grab the phone then!

I am Destroyed!

When I realized – it was too late!

Tears of blood, predicting a flood;
Worn out soul, screeching in mud.

Splendid mornings turn out to rust;
Where shedding tears is considered must.

Sparkling eyes chasing crystals in the sky;
Thou each gaze pulls me strongly, making a way to die.

Strings of emotion tuned to deviate and devastate;
Crumbled heart seeking the happiness over-delayed.

The beauty of my soul vanishes away;
Thou enchant a spell to stand out in the breaking day.

Abhorring the wounds, all over the heart;
Surrendering to the agony, caused by the poisoned dart.

Thou snatched my life, scorned the blissful smile;
Blessing with the everlasting pain, in thee own style.

World around me perishes as thee left me forlorn;
Sweet smells bitter, flowers turn into painful thorns.

Invisible thee, but apparent to me;
Seeking thou in Eden, finding the glee.

The Union Carriers

“WE ARE ONE” – the voice conquers the WORLD

Wrecked remains of a colossal mass,
Animals slaughtered in the fields grazing grass.
Hearts captive in a fist, ALAS,
A short expedition deliberated, yet to pass.

“WE ARE ONE” was their ultimate voice,
The union of strong and weak with no choice,
Applauding each other, they willingly rejoice,
Darting like arrows from bows, they hustled bustled and created noise.

They screamed out loud, they held hands,
They laughed, they giggled, they would understand,
They fought, they opposed, they gave up their lands,
They rose up high, they took a stand.

Hands clasped pretending to be barriers,
Defeated the swiftness of rivers, the UNION CARRIERS,
Thawed the glaciers, cramped the mountains, emerged as the gallant warriors,
Paced with the winds, illuminated like the glowing chandeliers.

One shell that destroyed their years struggle,
One hand that thrashed their lives forever.
One moment that exhaled poison to juggle,
One name that stabbed their present with the dagger.

Life’s miserable but their steps remained steadfast,
Life’s a curse but a hope of blessing at last,
Life’s a caravan but the Heaven is vast,
Life’s a conjecture, hope to revolutionize the past.

I stood weak envisaging the battlefield in words,
Tears rinsing the blood coated swords.
Almighty exists, thus no worldly Lords,
I embraced the eternal sleep, frail as a cord

The Labyrinth Spell

Life is a junk mesmerized with your spark,
Life is an outrageous scene spent with you in the PAST.
Life is a tender scar you left with an EVERLASTING mark,
Life is your BLESSING forcing the pain to last!

Life is what else I can say?
Something no less than a horrid dark day.
Thou intrigued me with an endless bay,
The bay of blood and tears to stay!

I never saw you losing the hold,
Thou warmth prevents my veins to cold.
Are you done or is it sold?
The piece of gold that I left without a fold!

You presented me with the pain of love,
You snagged me with my blood draining eyes above.
You lifted me, I felt the flight of the dove,
You released me behind the bars with a terrific shove. 

Will you ever come back?
Or I missed the train to the right track.
Everything seems serene but the words I lack,
Do not cast the spell again to trap me as your JACK!