Now or Never!

The time marked her flaws,
The scars marked her strengths,
She had crawled all the way up,
The walls nobody could climb,
They were painted the darkest shades of cold gray,
And while she had tried to run away from her demons,
She fell prey to the light from deep within her soul,
It was a slow motion embrace,
Watching the dark of the cold night fade into the bright crimson morning,
It felt like eternity embracing infinity,
It required no beginning nor ending,
This was her moment to escape from the thought of tomorrow,
Slow dancing with the present and her dreams followed,
This was her reminder to never stop climbing,
She was stronger than ever, it was now or never.

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He breathed magic in her soul,
And she was scarred no more,
He was confused and bruised,
She took him by the hand,
And showed him the light,
To bring his lost soul home,
The hardships were woven into their life,
Struggling each day to help each other survive,
But they wouldn’t give up just yet,
Even if they didn’t know what it was all worth,
They’d hold on to the feeling of love,
For nothing could pull them apart,
As they were eternal,
And their love was a short-lived eternity,
She was the very epitome of perfection,
He lived by the golden divine light of her eyes,
And he experienced heaven on Earth,
Whenever she wrapped him in her embrace,
He melted in her arms and blended into her existence,
She was what he called home.

All of you

Your love inspires me to paint all the different shades of my life on the canvas of your heart. I build the castles of my dreams in your arms. I carve my eternity within your existence. I see rainbows shining in your enchanting eyes. I taste hope when I kiss the rhythm off your musical lips. I feed on your laughter to see the dark night transform itself into bright morning light. I savor the passion with which you embrace me in your eloquent poetry. I breathe in your love to experience myself growing inside you. I gather that with your presence in my life, there will be no endings: either second chances or brand new beginnings. You and I are not the work of destiny; we are the power of choice.

I choose to consume you – all of me consuming all of you.

The Final Farewell

While he helped them say their final goodbyes, deep down he was not prepared for this unwanted farewell. His life has revolved around her and he became frantic imagining the world being so colorless and soulless without her presence by his side. Her eyes had shone brighter than the million stars lightening the gloomy sky.The searing pain seeped through his soul when he realized that her eyes would not be able to brighten his dark days ever again. Her warm summery smile had made his heart melt and his blood ran cold thinking that his heart would freeze without her heart-warming smiles. She had been there for him at each step of the way. She had not only taught him to tame the flight of his dreams but also the world of their reality. They had been deliriously happy together and it was unbelievable that she would decide to embark on a new journey without him.

He held her hand in his hand, kissing the fingertips but not for one second had he stopped praying for a miracle. He was crying his eyes out. He was not ashamed of his tears today because he was desperately waiting for their magic to seal the moment so they could stay together for eternity. Since the past forty-five minutes, he had sought various means to communicate with her: through his tears, the melody of his voice, the tranquility in his silence and the fire in his touch. His fingers had been interlaced with hers for the longest time and he hadn’t stopped mumbling in her ear but nothing seemed to be working. It killed him a thousand deaths for every second which brought them closer to the explosion of the ticking clock. It crushed his heart to see a part of him being taken away from him so ruthlessly but he couldn’t do much about it so he begged for mercy. He felt utterly powerless against the bullet of time. He was trying his best to stop her from abandoning his world and he wouldn’t give up until the very end.

She would never wake up again and machines wouldn’t be breathing for her anymore. However, they battled the last minute of their union with courage and strength that set an example for the soldiers in the war-zone.

He had lost more than a wife today — he had lost his soul.

That touch to make it all worthwhile <3

That touch to make it all worthwhile


Image Source: All Rights Reserved With: https://www.globalunison.wordpress.com

The Lost Girl

Please don’t leave,
Don’t leave my glowing world to be in the dark,
Please believe,
Your love has left me a permanent mark,
I have been chasing the rainbows just to see,
If there is a world beyond our interpretation of free,
I have been counting these stars in the night,
Counting the infinity is like blowing out the light,
I don’t want to let you down,
But I have looked everywhere around,
The girl you knew once upon a time,
She is nowhere to be found,
So can you help me find her?
‘Cause she must have lost the track,
She is willing to find her way back,
To your heart which she knows as her home,
Otherwise she might never cease to carelessly roam.

Please forgive me,
My imagination cannot seal the reality,
Please let me in,
For I have been choking my emotions under my skin,
I have been living with the lies just to see,
If there is a world beyond our uncertainties,
I have been falling in the arms of memories,
Dreaming my life with you for all eternity,
I don’t want to let you down,
But I have looked everywhere around,
The girl you knew once upon a time,
She is nowhere to be found,
So can you help me find her?
‘Cause she must have lost the track,
She is willing to find her way back,
To your heart which she knows as her home,
Otherwise she might never cease to carelessly roam.

Our Greatest Enemy

After a while, we will get used to this parade of so-called ‘I love you’ and there will be nothing new about us. Our mystery and chemistry will be resting in peace. There will be constant arguments about loyalty and sincerity for no reason at all. Every day will start with a quarrel and eventually we wouldn’t care if one of us is going to bed angry. Some days you will be grumpy while the other days, I will be screaming. We will be cursing and it will feel like love never existed between us. Our egos will not allow us to be apologetic and we will keep blaming each other regardless of being aware that it is nobody’s but our own fault if this life feels less like the safe haven we imagined with each other. There will only be a tug of war between us and if by chance sometimes once or twice a year (fortunately/unfortunately) we get to spend a day without picking up an argument; that will have to be a miracle. However, lets try to sort this out. Before we reach that stage when love is lost in the blur of an argument or trapped within the tick-tock of the clock, let’s love unconditionally and ‘live in the moment’. Thus no conditions and no consequences. If you can do it then love me or leave right now before we become our greatest enemy.

His forever can last a second or two,
Sometimes, not even a day get passed through,
He cradles me in his arms and I know this to be true,
His forever is our present, may it be an eternity or this passing view.

Can these clouds be my vessel to Heaven?

Can these clouds be my vessel to Heaven?


Photo Source: All Rights Reserved With: https://www.globalunison.wordpress.com

Born to be Loved

You were my master plan,
My eternity and my life span,
Nothing close to my imagination,
Nothing close to an ordinary man,
You were you,
A man dressed in blue,
For some reason,
I couldn’t see through,
A volcano erupting,
For I knew,
You were a man,
Born to be loved.

You were my everything,
My autumn and my spring,
The song I loved to sing,
Nothing close to the love I read about,
Nothing close to my fears and doubts,
You were you,
A man who knew the art,
For some reason,
I couldn’t stop my heart,
From falling,
From wanting,
From breaking,
The universe tore itself apart,
For this love I felt,
Nothing less than magic,
For I never knew,
It was unfortunate and tragic,
But what I always knew,
You were a man,
Born to be loved.

Forever Fantasy

He talks about a Forever,
I cannot define,
He talks about a Forever,
That cannot be mine,
He talks about a Forever,
That cannot reach the Finish-line,
He talks about a Forever,
A teaser like an old wine.

He talks about a Forever,
The one with a celebration,
He talks about a Forever,
The one with no foundation,
He talks about a Forever,
The one with a limited duration,
He talks about a Forever,
The life long temptation.

He talks about a Forever,
Nothing as such a fairy tale,
He talks about a Forever,
A fantasy when it’s described in detail,
He talks about a Forever,
I yearn to see one day,
He talks about a Forever,
A dreamy world for his eternal stay.

He talks about a Forever,
One that lives the age of our kiss,
He talks about a Forever,
A survival which is all about bliss,
He talks about a Forever,
One that is hard to resist,
He talks about a Forever,
A Forever where water and fire co-exist.

His forever can last a second or two,
Sometimes, not even a day get passed through,
He cradles me in his arms and I know this to be true,
His forever is our present, may it be an eternity or this passing view.

remote_image_1338398068


Photo Source: https://www.imgarcade.com

I’m BACK!

Welcome to England!

Welcome to England!

Hello Folks! I know time has been a hard core weapon since ever but the past two months have been crucial. For all those who have been following me since long and know me, they were well aware of the fact that I would be moving to England for my undergraduate studies. For all those who have recently started following me and kept me updated with their comments and likes, I can’t be more grateful for all the support and love given to me despite of the fact that I was away. I would put up no dialogues but I really missed being on here terribly; the blogging fraternity is another family to me and not interacting with my family was extremely difficult as I had to pace myself with time and kept on moving no matter what. This is one of the very major lessons I learnt back in England – Time never stops for you and you have to keep moving on with the hands of the clock. At times, we over estimate ourselves by complementing the arms of clock pacing with us but it is always the other way round. It is the humans who put up all the struggle with time. I can’t express how deeply I prayed for the 2 months in England to end so I can see my family again in the Christmas vacations but once the December was up, I was too settled that I didn’t want to go and creep on the torture of seeing my family and leaving them back again after New Year. It doesn’t in any case means I was not excited to see them but 10th January 2013 has been haunting me since I have had the ticket in my hand. Anyway, if I move on with the arms of time then I shouldn’t be complaining about 10th January which awaits 20 days in between but I should be appreciating the fact that I am enjoying the time with my siblings and parents.

I treated myself even before I knew my result back in Leicester! Cheers!

I treated myself even before I knew my result back in Leicester! Cheers!

There have been many posts in pending about my life in England, lessons learnt on my way and much blah blah to come so stay tuned. Well, I am laughing! Shucks! This is exactly how we would advertise our product in terms of business studies with much more creativity. I will talk about my subjects later but right now I am excited to announce the score of the end term! 80% which is  terrific(at least for me)! I scored around 76% in midterms and I put all my heart and soul in studying a subject I have never studied before; BUSINESS – surprisingly I scored highest in that subject. English had been a pain in my over all body; not because I don’t like it but writing essays, in-text citations, references and what not literally sucks me. They require bulks of concentration so English becomes the toughest at times even for the nationals who refers to English as their first language. 

There have been many funny and embarrassing moments with me; the very recent one was something like this…

A stranger approaches me while I am waiting on the coach to Birmingham on the coach stand..

Stranger: Heya! You alright?
Me: Absolutely, thank you. (Yet confused why he approached me)
Stranger: Do you have a fag?
Me: Pardon Please.. (Much more confused)
Stranger: Erm.. A fag! Do you have one?
Me: Pardon.. What’s a fag? (Already embarrassed)
Stranger: I mean a cigarette. (A shy smile which indicated he wanted to laugh)
Me: Oh I see, I am sorry. I don’t smoke.|
Stranger: Seems so.. Thank you.

Anyway, he left me almost flushed with embarrassment and I was like “Crappy Crap” mumbling that to myself cause Brits would rather come up with “Bloody Bullshit” – Okay, I am not teaching any swear words over here and I believe that most of my readers are above 18 and if not so a very humble apology! Skip it! Anyway, in these two months, I have known the reason why my accent, pronunciation and so called vocabulary is “AMERICAN” not because of my education in an american school (We were always taught to spell “COLOUR” as “COLOUR” not “COLOR”) but my well pronounced “R’s” the sound of “T” making somewhat a “D” and then my vowels sounding a bit different and of course I wont use British slang or swear words cause I have always been into American Media! I somehow managed to travel to America in my lifetime and this was my first time ever in Britain (what makes me laugh is they call it GB – Great Britain, no offence meant but it is just funny.) They used to laugh on my pronunciation and I used to laugh on theirs and time went by. Like they would pronounce YOU-TUBE in a completely different way than me and this time its the vowel “U” which is contradicting.

Some of the pictures I took on my way to Birmingham Coach Station

On my way to Birmingham Coach Station

Sun rays felt beautiful that day!

Sun rays felt beautiful that day!

I took a coach from Leicester to Birmingham Coach Station and then a coach from Birmingham Coach Station to Birmingham Airport. I was already tired! 3 hours before boarding and then a very good news how my flight has been 2 hour delayed! Waiting for an eternity on the Birmingham Airport which is not really bigger than Birmingham Coach Station but I made it into the plane after those 4 and a half never ending hours. I planned on sleeping and I was happy how 7 to 8 hours of sleep awaited me somehow but the Emirates crew couldn’t see me resting like a poor baby, they woke me up around 4 times just asking me or rather begging (pleading if begging is a harsh word) me to try their award winning dinner meal. I denied thrice faking a smile but fourth time, I was blown up. I asked her to bring it up and she was more than happy that she woke a passenger to try their award winning meal and I told her how about that I have seen the award winning meal and smelt it, if she is feeling any better? She was too embarrassed and I felt guilty for being harsh but it was not at all intentional; the frustration came by itself.

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The most beautiful feeling was watching the sunrise over the horizon – it was a memorable moment for me. I have no idea if I have talked about the sky in England or not but I have observed those beautiful pinkish purplish skies turning slightly into golden orange and then sun settling down to hide itself for nearly 12 hours or more. The stars and sky has practically helped me with my loneliness – I mumbled to them, took long walks wandering off around the city just to get hold of the bunch of those sparkling stars so I can stay there and watch it for an eternity. There was this place, a garage kinda place where there were too many slopes. It was around a 5 minutes walk from where I was living, I enjoyed every bit of going higher and higher on the slope and then observing the skyline of the city – tremendously beautiful. The nature has been fascinating me more than I could have ever thought. It became my partner in those miserable days when I used to smile only looking at the trees with no leaves hoping I would see them dressed up soon enough in the summer next year!

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Nature invaded my soul and I felt better with every passing day. I got hold of this lovely girl, Syrics, a Chinese girl from Shanghai. She was in my class but we started getting along when we got to know we lived in the same building; she lives on the ground floor and I lived on the 5th floor. Eating together, hanging out together, watching horror movies together, shopping together, complaining about the cold weather, girly talks and what not! She was a Chinese, terrible at English but marvelous at gestures – I am just laughing remembering how when we geared our friendship, she used to search words for me to describe me and situations. For instance  if that failed miserably which used to happen at times (usage of sentences; one word has to be used in a specific manner – English is a language with million synonyms to the same word) she used to start gesturing and trying to explain me through actions as if she is dumb and I used to laugh like a creep and she used to chase me screaming “You Are Killed!” We saw the Christmas Lights going up together in the City Center on December 1st and she was so excited. I can’t ever forget the excitement on her face when I handed her Christmas present to her and she was removing the tape cautiously so she didn’t tear it off and I screamed how she should just tear off and then again our never ending laughs. I have always had my girlies being possessive about me and she tops the list! Briefly, I adore and love her incredibly!

Switching back to my flight, there was just an hour’s stay at Dubai International Airport and I was off for another 2 hours to see my family. The sky was clear and occupying the window seat again thrilled me and I was on cloud nine. And finally the magic moment was there; I saw my DAD and I ran off like I haven’t seen him for years and the tears rolled down my cheeks without even any prior notice. This was the very first time when I realized what does it mean by crying in happiness. I was smiling like a jerk and yet the tears welled up! Simply, I missed my family. My mum couldn’t make it to the airport cause it was a working day when I arrived  (December 12th) around noon time and she had to look after my siblings cause schools get off around the same time but when I saw her, I hugged her. I missed her the most – the entire time I missed my mum the most and I think its natural. She says I have grown up but I feel I have grown up within the time span of these two months. I don’t know what’s coming up next in the upcoming 20 days with my family but all I know is 10th January is going to be much more crucial than the rest!

PS–  Will be responding back to all the comments real soon! Apologies for the delay! I can’t thank more for the consistent support! Love you all!

Beyond The Vision!

When I was a little girl, the world around me was like a bubble. I now think, if I would have popped my finger out of that bubble in those days, the world would have not been observed as a merry-go-round by me. A small girl who bombarded her parents with a “WHY”, “HOW” and “WHEN” frequently and who was fearless to burst the bubble and come face to face with the ruthless reality pertaining in the society; but Alas! The vindictive time, it always has a great timing! At the age of 4, this girl asked her teacher, “Ma’am, why can’t birds speak?” That day her teacher told her that every WHY in the world can not be answered and due to the undeveloped brain cells which failed to analyze the answer in the appropriate manner, that answer of the teacher was saved as a permanent file in ROM of her brain that could never be removed. Whenever, she faced a situation or a question and as soon as her brain used to prepare her for asking WHY due to the perplexity, the same stored file used to bang her head at the right moment reminding her of the teacher’s answer. She laid in her bed every night wondering how the sky is standing without pillars when no building can. She marveled how the sun shines so brightly when the moon was merely the opposite. She was bewildered when she questioned herself why the sea is so immense that she can’t see the ending spot. The perplexed questions ended every night with an exposure to the unexpected valley of dreams. Hence, that is the time when this 4 year old girl started coming out of the sealed bubble. She now wanted to be a colorful butterfly which can fly and be responsible for her very own flight.

Some of my many journals!

This girl started developing wings and the bubble was harmed every time her wings flapped at any instant. She lived in the world of her QUESTIONNAIRE. The questions, she kept to herself which were ultimately the reason for the quest to discover and explore beyond her knowledge. She wanted someone to hold up to her and answer her; she again faced hard time analyzing which medium could be the safest. Yeah, her wit clicked, why not her very own mother; but again that permanently stored answer of the teacher amplified her mystification and that is when she discovered that there exist a PAPER and a PENCIL that can be her best friend and unlike any other beings on this planet, their mouths will be forever sealed. She was amazed to discover such an innovative idea and at the age of 8, she started maintaining her very own registers. She did not want anyone to know about her thoughts regarding anything; she wanted those journals to be as personal as her body was to her. She was unaware of the fact that an eight year old doll would not be given sufficient privacy to survive and hence would be intruded more than once if the hidden registers came across the eyes of her guardians. She tried her level best to never let anybody know that she writes to release the burden off her shoulders; she carried those registers in her bag every time with an unpleasant fear of her thoughts becoming publicized.

Around the corner, this truth was not concealed for a very long time and she found her mother reading one of her private journal once she woke up from a very sound sleep. That was the first time she ever yelled at anybody. She was crying, she was blaming herself, she was regretting for choosing paper to be her best friend as it eventually showed its disloyalty. There was nothing confidential mentioned in those journals which could not be read by her mother but the very mutual thought of how untrustworthy even a non-living thing can be occupied her and this trauma didn’t end well. Her mother held her, caressed her, kissed her and embraced her collecting her entirely in her maternal arms where she sobbed for an eternity. She kept repeating the same line of how she hated herself. Within this phase, she realized one of her very good qualities that she doesn’t require an eternity to get over a mishap. Within two days, she was the same cheerful girl who lived in her own world with the same innocent heart building more question with every passing moment but now she did not have any best friend. At school, she was a quiet and shy girl who always succeeded in academics with a remarkable margin but showed no interest in any extra co-curricular activities. The time continued to pass by and taught her various lessons of life but she missed that unfaithful friend of hers – PAPER! The only thought that used to startle her was that why could she not forgive her best friend? After a year or so, she recovered and was friends with PAPER again. This time she wanted to be more aware of her mother not reading anything; she was now growing into an adolescent and the life was chasing her like she was a bone being chased by a starving dog. She continued filling sheets and sheets with her personal experiences, her daily affairs, how the world haunted her, how she wanted to be everything but not a wife (like her mother), how she wanted to explore the space and etc. The dreamy world was yet not over until 12, subsided with mature thoughts than her age-group. Even her dreamy world craved the meaning of life and the reason behind her existence. She often used to write about it when she entered into a very charming and alluring phase of any human’s life – TEENAGE!

Now this doll was 13; no more a doll indeed. She was a grown up girl who was ready to flap her wings open and explode the bubble confining her abilities. She flew swirling around the boundaries of life and exploded it with a charisma. Her teenage was abnormal or rather should I say it was normal because it was not the same boy-friends, drinks, clubs, pubs and dance floors that united her life and thrilled her but it was her escalating confidence that made her “UNIQUE” in the gatherings. Her parents were astounded themselves, she was paranormal with her brain grasping more than required for her age. She was no more a shy doll but a confident and stunning girl who could sway around with daffodils and make the universe dance on her finger tips. She turned out to be a debater where her teachers encouraged her to debate frequently to enhance her inborn skills with the weapon of experience. The paper remained her best friend throughout; though it was disloyal at times but she realized how her best friend could be someone else’s friend too. Her acquaintances called her arrogant, rude, she was blamed for her attitude when all she did was smile – her gleaming eyes smiled to their remarks. She was blessed with an enriched soul, all her job was to nourish it with plenty of resources in order to live up to what is expected of her by the world as well as Him.  

Let you soul be free like a flying bird because ETERNITY lives in there.

This girl is ordinary just like YOU. A compassionate soul living in everybody – the only difference between YOU and her is she listened and responded to her soul since the day it called out to her; she was accomplishing what she was asked for by her Almighty. This is a time to catch the right bus at the right station and listen to your blaring soul, let the questions seep your heart, get a medium to express yourself and immortal soul BUT be aware of the hazards and obstacles on your way because no accomplishment can be achieved without the audacity to try. Live every moment in a sacred way cause neither can you trust your breath nor your life – this little doll gave us the same message of how to never trust the voices you hear from your ears but trust the sole voice that you can hear from the ears of your heart and soul – the voice of Eternity.