Princess of Darkness

Stargazing, soul-searching and traveling,
Hammocks, polaroids and galaxies,
Experiences emanating magic and madness,
Losing track of time and reality,
Her new-found wings defying the laws of gravity,
While all along she had been surrendering to her mind,
The calls of her heart rings stranger chords,
New tattoos, gypsy guitars and intoxicated winds,
And her dreams pulling their own swords,
Battling the world with her poetic pen,
She fiercely coloured her own rewards,
Insanity raised peace but normality doubts,
Her demons imparted strength but angles chaos,
She was a dance of fire and ice,
Embracing the cold and craving the burns,
Oblivious to the fundamentals of life, she failed to see the joy in pain,
She had to rejoice the fallings of autumn to cherish the buzz of spring,
While she believed her days to be moonlit and nights starless,
She was rescued from the emptiness into wilderness,
In the superficiality of this passing world,
The angels of wisdom scarred her innocence,
The brutal sword of time portrayed her Satanic Highness,
Crush her bones but dare not crumble her spirit,
On the path to enlightenment, she was a princess of darkness,
Beyond the stars, even her shadows were skilfully guarded,
The dark within her soul burnt the colours of gold,
So if her magic, madness and wisdom be mistaken for darkness,
She hoped to never find light again.

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Within you is the light of a thousand suns.


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Diary of Nobody -XIV-

“Sup”, they ask.

You must be aware that youth nowadays like to shorten everything for the sake of some apparent swag or for some ridiculous cool-effect. I struggle to be a part of this age where appearances need to be dope and emotions stand no hope — where the soul is ruthlessly starved to feed the goddamn ego.

Is there any way we can return to our childhood? I don’t want to fit in this world without you. It might seem like an absurd thought at the very first instance but I feel like I have lost the soul I thought I could rock and jam with. My soul hasn’t been fed for a while and the sense of emotional numbness invades my sanity. Netflix keeps me company now, sometimes it is family but where exactly are you? Weren’t you supposed to be my guardian angel and protect me from the forces of evil? I was told love has no boundaries only to realize for myself that love is all about boundaries.

I am healing. I am trying. I am coping. I am surviving. I think, reviving too.

“Its difficult but not impossible.”, your voice echoes in my head and drives me insane. How do I tell you that impossibility is just a word for you while I have to live through the reality of circumstantial intricacy? I am disgusted with myself for not being able to find peace and solace within myself and for unknowingly creating a bubble-world around you. Why do I have to die a little every single day because you have ceased to be a part of my constantly-recurring struggle for existence?

I hurt every day but I cannot bring myself to the point of loathing you. I try to strike a conversation with you but I don’t know what else could I ask you except of your well-being and the gossip about weather since I have noticed that you are fond of posting pictures of snow, rain, spring, fall and what-not-weather-related on your social media. I try to converse heart-to-heart with you but you’ve given up. You had given up a long time ago since I was the reason for your frustrations, troubles and bruises. I disappointed you once and in turn you never trusted me with anything again, not even with a candid conversation. I wish you could see how I wait desperately for the times you would be around. However, I can never catch your eye like others do. Perhaps, you have stopped responding to any gestures which may indicate very subtly that I need you. One moment, I want to let you in and expose all my vulnerabilities and the other moment, I stop dead in my tracks for I fear that I will smash the wall which stands tall between us necessary for our survival and to maintain our individuality. I fear that I will burst your bubble with my unfortunate reality. The underlying fear of letting you down (yet again) and losing whatever little we have dictates my life at the very moment because seeing you torn apart is the last of the last things I could imagine indulging myself in.

So, I reside in silence while thunder roars within me. I hibernate to be able to hide my scars as best as I can. My world exists in a shell purposely so you can cherish life the way you do and make every second of it divine. I see you being yourself with others and exuberating just the right amount of confidence and charisma, and I am at peace. While you are doing just fine and dealt courageously with the unimaginable aftermath of our adversities; I, on the other hand, am still living through it.

You know what? You might think that after all this time, I should knock it off already and just be like you. But, you simply can’t see that normal has never been my forte, and it never will be.

Them Versus Us

The knots in my stomach,
The lump in my throat,
Their false-promises,
The cruel way they gloat,
So I wonder how can they not feel stress and anxiety?
So I wonder how can they let themselves be another causality of the society?
So I wonder how can they sleep at night knowing that people are dying of starvation?
So I wonder how can they ignore the ongoing conflicts and brutality?

As I pace back and forth,
Searching for an answer,
As I continue to live like this,
The suppression of free speech,
Eating me away like cancer,
So I wonder how can they not want peace in reality?
So I wonder how can they not try to eradicate poverty and inequality?
So I wonder how can they be socially blind?
So I wonder how can they ignore the suffering of mankind?

I follow through the dark,
Searching for the glimpse of light,
The hunger for change,
Holding onto hope,
For the pitch-black night to shine so bright,
We don’t have to listen to their lies anymore,
We have the power to set a vision,
Ultimately leading us to our mission,
So I wonder why do we blame them when we can be stronger on our own?
So I wonder why do we not unite and fight our battles as one?
So I wonder why do we hesitate to take action when we know we should?
So I wonder why do we not rescue humanity by moulding bad into good?

Our Greatest Enemy

After a while, we will get used to this parade of so-called ‘I love you’ and there will be nothing new about us. Our mystery and chemistry will be resting in peace. There will be constant arguments about loyalty and sincerity for no reason at all. Every day will start with a quarrel and eventually we wouldn’t care if one of us is going to bed angry. Some days you will be grumpy while the other days, I will be screaming. We will be cursing and it will feel like love never existed between us. Our egos will not allow us to be apologetic and we will keep blaming each other regardless of being aware that it is nobody’s but our own fault if this life feels less like the safe haven we imagined with each other. There will only be a tug of war between us and if by chance sometimes once or twice a year (fortunately/unfortunately) we get to spend a day without picking up an argument; that will have to be a miracle. However, lets try to sort this out. Before we reach that stage when love is lost in the blur of an argument or trapped within the tick-tock of the clock, let’s love unconditionally and ‘live in the moment’. Thus no conditions and no consequences. If you can do it then love me or leave right now before we become our greatest enemy.

His forever can last a second or two,
Sometimes, not even a day get passed through,
He cradles me in his arms and I know this to be true,
His forever is our present, may it be an eternity or this passing view.

Can these clouds be my vessel to Heaven?

Can these clouds be my vessel to Heaven?


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Finally (the Winter Break is Here!!)

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I love how magnificently the seven colors manifest themselves in a ‘Rainbow’ as one– can we be as noble as these colors who come together to give this world an utter sight of beauty?

 

So finally – my home is calling me. I am visiting my family after a very long nine months which I thought would never end. Earlier this year, I couldn’t go back in the summer break cause I was busy with an internship. Hence, I was looking forward to the winter break for a long time. However, my family is much more excited than me, my mother is a given but except of her, my sister is going insane with the count down.

I am happy and nervous at the same time. Returning home after so long does bring back all the emotions not just associated with my family but it also stirs the feeling of patriotism and love for my motherland. I am happy (not really excited but delighted) to go back home because I have missed my mother a lot. Also, this is the longest I have stayed away from home to the date. Anyhow, the flip side of the coin is that I am nervous. One thing that I am afraid of is that I am a changed person now. I cherish my personal freedom and value the peace in isolation. Going back home means all the hustle bustle, relatives and family gatherings. I have never been the social type anyway ( I am not shy but reserved – there is a difference!). Hence, now that I have been living on my own for almost three years – going back poses a threat on my personal freedom. I will have to be a part of family now while here in England, I can do whatever I want (as in I can wake, sleep and study whenever I want to; eat whatever I want – I can live like a night owl). At home, I have to go by a certain time table; not as in somebody dictating my life but more like a civilized approach to routine life which I don’t really care about in England. The second issue that concerns me is my temperament. I was never the calm person anyway and have always blamed my gene for this short temperament. However, now I ‘think’ it is worse. Anything can possibly trigger me off and I can lose it ( please don’t advise anger management – pretty please) but I think it’s one of the disadvantage of living on your own. The feeling of being independent and isolation leaves you a little confined and if somebody even tries to hop into your space, then you have ‘Watch Out’ written straight across your forehead. Although, it could be just me but I have heard people ranting about this more than often. So I can only hope that I don’t lose my temper and keep myself under good check and control. After all, it’s a party time for me — finally a break!!

Well, I have my flight in few hours and I hope Emirates is on time which is highly unlikely! Also, I apologize in advance for missing out on all the good stuff I get to read written by all you lovely people. See you guys soon in a different land with different experiences! Happy Holidays!!!!

Live, Love, Inspire & (don’t forget to)Smile. Believe in yourself and you can conquer all your fears.


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Almost()

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Almost absolutely,
He took away my breath;
Almost single-handedly,
He conquered my heart.

Almost immediately,
He confessed his love;
Almost spontaneously,
He promised me a ‘Forever’.

Almost motionlessly,
He made his first move;
Almost gracefully,
He lifted me in his arms.

Almost generously,
He blew his kisses;
Almost miraculously,
He built us up.

Almost quickly,
He savored every inch of my body;
Almost boldly,
He claimed what belonged to him.

Almost effortlessly,
He became my world;
Almost promptly,
We were each other’s abode.

Almost massively;
We grew in love;
Almost flawlessly,
We held each other.

Almost necessarily,
We chose a wrong path;
Almost certainly,
We agreed to separate.

Almost accusingly,
His eyes didn’t utter a word;
Almost mournfully,
I accepted the Fate’s challenge.

Almost shortly,
I realized what I had lost;
Almost horrifyingly,
There was no way back.

Almost carefully,
I took a wound to my heart;
Almost soothingly,
I lived in peace with the pain.

Almost hungrily,
I waited and waited;
Almost harshly,
I realized the truth.

Mostly, life will almost stop happening;
If I can precisely predict about its certainty.


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A Call For Action

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This can not be my abode,
Life does not have a hibernate mode,
Suddenly killing people can not be right,
Can black ever be transformed to white?

The color of innocent blood stains my soul,
Every inculpable death calls out for a just role,
Is it that the peace is unwanted?
Is it that we pretend to be united?

We tweet and post statuses; we shout and protest in rage,
We sympathise and compromise; we pretend we understand this Age,
Praying to Almighty to show a miracle at this stage,
Hoping for the goodness to free itself from this evil cage.

When nothing seems to be working, we pray day and night,
Muslims, Hindus, Jews and Christians – they pray to Allah, Krishna, Moses and Jesus,
The concept of God is different but the call is one,
These religions are distinct yet peace is what they yearn.

Don’t let a man’s religion define him for you,
This world needs us and we need to be true,
No religion preaches terrorism, murder and criminality,
Let’s stop this innocent blood shed – the result of forceful brutality.

For making this world a better place, we don’t need to go to Gaza or Syria,
We don’t need prompt updates on this manipulative social media,
Disconnect yourself and stop talking – it’s time for actions to speak louder than words,
Little deeds of goodness can broaden our horizon – challenging the spirit of a free bird.

Brace yourself for it’s you who can begin this journey of good,
Embrace yourself for it’s you who can bring the change you should,
Stop fooling yourself and stop praying for miracles,
Your actions are your warriors, miracles would happen merely when your warriors would.

I Love You!

Note: This poem is another real-life story. This is the story of my very dear friend who has over the time fallen for a man who possess a life-turning history that can move anyone! He is a gem and truly deserve to be loved for who he is. I have met him personally and I believe that men like him are found rarely on this planet for he never curses the life’s mishaps instead enjoy competing with them. He is an inspiration and I believe what he did for his family isn’t a piece of cake. It is his birthday today and I wish him a very warm Happy Birthday with blessings for his health and happiness. I hope he and my friend can succeed in paving their way together.

The poem can be confusing but I do not want to fade the charm by my explanations. All I can say is consider my friend and her lover on the scene – I’m not included even if the poetry sounds like “I” all the time.

Hey buddy, if you are reading this one’s for you!  Happy Birthday! *High Five*

Your arms comfort me,
Your love is all I can see.

Deep oceans and vast skies,
Love’s in the air – no goodbyes.

Claim me; I belong to you,
Waiting on the moment when I can say I DO!

Life’s been a torture and a harsh examination.
You’ve fought the hatred, bullies and raising inflation.

The day you sobbed while murmuring the story of your past,
My heart was stabbed and my heartbeat so fast.

You told me how previously you had nothing to eat,
You had to shift houses – move from street to street.

Your wife was your support and you loved her truly,
She paced with you despite of life being so unruly.

You looked at her and the miseries seemed off shore,
Her arms were your heaven and her love your highest score.

The world conspired against both of you,
However, you remained steadfast as the time flew.

*From this turn, I have changed the speech of the poem. The poem continues to be his narration (in my words, of course) *

Seven years of struggle, efforts and resistance,
Letting her go was the destiny’s decision.

Two different religions portray us as criminals,
If love is a crime then I will commit it in all my life’s intervals.

The world parted us,
M
y soul couldn’t take the fuss.

The divorce papers were on the desk,
Failure invaded my heart – my reflection so grotesque.

How can I sign them for I love her name?
How can I forget those memories we together framed?

The world’s cruel and brutal but my heart is at peace,
I smile when I encounter how her life’s at ease.

Her gleaming eyes deserve all the happiness,
How can I forget her lovely caresses?

She loved me, for who I was,
She adored me exceptionally without laws.

Today, on my birthday I cherish my memories with her,
Our lively memories that can never be blurred.

She looks at me from the photo I have clutched,
Her pretty smile makes me feel the warmth of her touch.

Many may come in my life though,
No one can fade the charm of her glow.

Life can be excruciating to wound you,
Make your way through and be forever true.

The Golden Dream!

Hey ya everybody!! Greetings and love to everybody who never failed me and my blog despite of my absence every now and then due to busy schedules lining up as my university will be beginning by the end of September 2012 (which is in noway so far away and I am going so nervous)! This poem is dedicated to my friend and a very beautiful blogger, Neeraj! Please do check out his blog and before you start reading the poem , I would like you to know something. This poetry is composed by me but the idea totally belongs to my friend (Neeraj – he owns the copyright) so please enjoy and have a good time reading!! 

PS– I know, I have been terribly missing out with reading as I wasn’t hunched in front of my laptop from some days (I know my mommy was really happy to make me get away with my first love – laptop) but I assure everybody of you that I am catching up with every post I left reading on every blog I am subscribed to! Love you all! Peace.

An exquisite location and a heart-breaking crowd,
Cheerleaders entertaining and cheering out loud.

Hundreds and thousands of athletes from across the world,
Prepared to compete enthusiastically as the heartily waves of anxiety swirled.

Running tracks offer a beautiful vision with athletes on their marks,
The bullet is shot and there they go running; revealing their mighty sparks.

I participated and cleared the pre-Olympic match,
Celebrating my victory, my thoughts jammed with the original catch.

There I am on my mark for the final match – a 100 meter race,
I say a silent prayer in my heart, hoping Almighty would help me ace it with grace.

I run and run – huffing and puffing,
I give a damn to others – running and panting.

I see the “FINISH LINE”,
Chills run down my spine.

My spirit reassures how the gold medal belongs to only me,
My heart is pumping for the triumph to embrace glee.

I have left many behind and my confidence shoots for the stars,
I can run faster than I previously did – my legs functioning like wheels on the cars. 

I cross the finish line with my wet eyes,
Overwhelmed with the joy of victory after numerous tries.

Daddy pats my shoulder and embraces me,
“I am proud of you, my son”, he exclaims in glee.

Squinting my eyes to the sunlight piercing through the curtains in my room,
I smile with my parched lips – delighted with the sensation to bloom.

Footprints In The Mud

As we walk in the wet mud – footprints track us all the way long!

Exquisite nights across the sea shore;
The warmth of love soaring to the core.

Hand in hand as they walk;
Footprints in the mud – their sweet talk.

Redefining love in their very own way;
The wind’s in their favor to savor their stray.

The legacy of betrayal is drifted as they collide;
Ensuring their commendable chemistry makes a big stride.

Pursuing their heart with the rhythm of the flowing river;
Affection embraces them while their heartbeat shivers and quivers.

Love is their life and each other’s arms their abode;
Rocking and cradling each other – they stroll from road to road.

They are homeless – they require a shelter;
Summer is their contender as they swelter.

They are clueless walking aimlessly;
Adoring and fondling each other shamelessly.

The emancipated couple pursues the path of sincerity and loyalty;
Peace and harmony dominates their relationship – compassion treats their royalty.