For as long as she was in his life, my presence wouldn’t count. For as long as I will have to be compared to an image of another being who was clearly seamless, I wouldn’t relish my imperfect reality. For as long as I was invisible to him, I would have to retaliate to convince him that I exist; that I have feelings too and that there beats a heart in the centre of my body that is capable of loving and hating. Now, it was in his hands to decide which of the lesser evil to choose.
Tag Archives: Presence
Your family is your first Ministry!
August 12th 1996 – a two-year old little girl surely did not know the significance of this date at such a young age yet she celebrated it every year (and will continue to) since the day she knew what birthdays were and whose birth date made this date special. Well, if you guys (I mean both gals and fellas) are thinking to apply brakes to the present and dive into the history books or lectures you must have received in past from your history teachers then take a deep breath – I am not talking about anything such as that yet I will astound you with how every date is special within itself.
Except of some breathtaking facts like the only silent film “Wings” won an Oscar for best picture in 1927 on the very same date of August 12th, Soviet Union conducted a secret test of its 1st hydrogen bomb in 1953 on the same date, William Shatner was married to Gloria Rand on August 12th 1956 (yeah, its lame but spare me without smacking me down), the very first time two people were in space in 1962 on August 12th, China & Japan signed a peace treaty in 1978, the very first IBM Personal Computer was released on the very same date (12th August) in 1981 and in 1996 I was blessed with a new-born baby – of course I can’t be a mother at the age of two but a baby brother was warmly welcomed!! Two years younger than me – not even exactly two; just a one day less than 2 because he is 12th August and me 13th! Celebrating birthday together is utmost fun but this time it was something special – it was his “SWEET SIXTEENTH”! This post is going to be informal so anyone who wishes to kick me or punch me in my gut ; all of you are warmly welcome to email me but the emotional and exhilarating episode yet have to gear up!
Well, it was his sweet sixteenth and my eighteenth so August 2012 was much awaited since New Year (or may be even before)! His birthday was a blast! I surprised him at the midnight with some balloons and a cake and party crackers so I can just blew him off his seat and make him wonder at how super awesome his siblings are! I am sure he felt it but he didn’t feel comfortable to express his happiness and there was a reason behind that too. His O levels result was expected on August 13th (my birthday) so he was all anxious about the upcoming result and least concerned to take part in the celebrations of his birthday blast. At times, I asked him to smile and be confident about how his hard work and struggle would be paid back but all I received was a “GRIN” or may be some words under his breath (can be curse words too for releasing down the pressure in the most abnormal way) or it was an outburst like “SHUT UP” or “DUHH” – anyway whatever it was; it made me go all crazy to tease him more and more! He slept around 3 in the morning (mum and dad were certainly snoring in their bed by that time) and before that he was praying for himself like geeks! I even teased him that if he would have put this much effort before exams in his studies then he would have not been this worried – he hated me for pulling his leg from time to time but isn’t it all we call “THE SIBLING’S LOVE”! I even offered him a drive though I did not have my driving license as there was still a day to go to be 18 but he refused and I think he missed out the fun we would have had wandering from street to street playing with the peace of night. After all, he slept at 3 am and I was all curious to make the day special for him. I made a card for him and packed him a digital camera and a perfume (Eternity for MEN) that I had bought for him earlier – I hoped he would love it. I then slept around 6 in the morning and woke up before him to make some coffee muffins he loves. Few hours later, when he was smiling and laughing I was contented. It is always a different feeling to see your young boy smiling and laughing; a feeling of contentment and delight embraces the soul when you succeed to paint a smile across his face – when they smile, the efforts are worth it. I was on cloud nine as I have had succeeded to make him forget the anxiety of his upcoming result. He loved the presents whole-heartedly (greatly expected, who wouldn’t have had? – I was saving for an eternity to buy him those things). After all, the day ended and I captured his smiles in my head as I knew I would be away from them very soon (my university starting and I have to move to Leicester, England). There was no surprise for me at midnight but million calls and my parent’s and sibling’s hugs and wishes made it special in itself – I cherished each and every moment as I wondered if I would be here to celebrate my next birthday; all I did the entire time was resisted myself to not spill a tear because I didn’t want my mommy to get upset or overwhelming at this particular day!
Don’t forget, when I write there is always a message concealed and this time there is one too. Family is family and there is no alternative for family – neither your boy-friend/girl-friend nor your friends because your parents are a treasure in disguise. You may not realize their worth in their life time but once they abandon you then the thousand wishes in the wish-well can’t bring them back so love them now for who they are and thank them for supporting you throughout without any selfish means. Your siblings are your very best friends; they make the world around you beautiful and amusing – the fun and enjoyment you have with them is an exciting priceless adventure that in no way can be compared to anything in this universe. They understand you and defend you even when you are wrong; take your blames on their own shoulders even at the age of six; argue with parents and the world around to prove you right – their presence is a blessing for which you should be grateful everyday. I read it somewhere and it fascinated me a lot and so I will share it with you.
BOY-FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.
GIRL-FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.
FRIEND = Look at the last three words – END.
FAMILY = Look at the last three words – ILY – I LOVE YOU.
Amazing, isn’t it? I love my family and their presence is a blessing for me for which I am thankful to Almighty and will be throughout my life! I pray for their protection from evil and health and happiness. Amen. Do not forget to pray for your family everyday; they should be your very first priority so if you are done reading it and haven’t talked to your parents or siblings (even daughters or sons for the matter) since a while then call them up and let them know that they will always be cherished. This world is not a place for hatred instead it should be the aroma of love spreading far and wide; hence forget the old wounds and take an initiative to cradle your relationships and knot a new thread if you have not been in contact with your family and if my words aren’t convincing then remember your childhood days – I am sure you will be rushing to grab the phone then!